elisabethflygerochfar

Today is really one of them! I think it all comes from only having 1 more month left here in Indiana, coming here is one of the best things I have ever done and that made me think about what other things have I done that have been really good for me?!

The best thing I have ever done was to start play handball, friends like the ones I have got from that is priceless! Number 2, 3 and 4 on the list all involve moving...moving to Mallorca, moving to Indiana and moving to Helsingborg...why is it that moving makes me happy? Is it the freedom of not being judged or my constant desire of meeting new people or what, am I just that restless and will I ever stop moving around, if that is what makes me feel good why should I stop?! Maybe I am just not suited for staying in the same place?! Right now the thought of having children or family tying me down scares the shit out of me and having to give up the possibility to spontaneously move to another country because of someone else totally freaks me out!!

I have no idea but right now I actually don't want to move anywhere! I want to stay right here with these amazing people I have met and keep meeting all the time, it is like a never ending stream of interesting people! Today I just feel like crying actually and at the same time as I wanna be around all these people I have got to know and love so much all the time I also just wanna be alone 'cause I don't want to get more attached or meet any more wonderful friends that I just will end up missing like crazy when I have to go home...:(

Crappy, shitty day!!

I don't know what I want and I don't know what I don't want anymore, everything is a blurr and I just want to take a break from it!!!

Instead of studying for my stupid exam as I should do I am now in bed trying to figure out where and when I can go next time just to keep my mind of the fact that this fantastic time is coming to an end! So things that are going through my mind right now except all the boring things are things like Can I do my final student teaching at the swedish school of "somewhere" and Can I do my final big essay somewhere else????????????????

TOTAL BRAINBLURRRRRRR!!!!!!!! :(

And as if this wasn't enough, WHY am I ALWAYS sick?!?!?!? I love going to the gym but I can't 'cause I'm always sick!!!

Wow, I was just gonna do a short note to complain a little and feel sorry for myself but I guess it turned out I had a lot more on my mind than I thought...probably gonna regret putting all these emotions on the internet tomorrow but I guess it doesn't hurt trying a new approach to deal with this...